Billy White, 26, posted into ‘Manchester Student Group’ – a group on Facebook for general information about student life in Manchester. He shared his experiences with depression, anxiety and the medication he takes. The response his post got has seen him get over 20,000 likes on his personal page, 2,000 likes in the group, and has seen many other students thanking him and sharing their experience. This is what he posted:
“Well, here goes, my life over the last few months and my experience with sertraline…
That medication allows me to deal with a normal day to day life. Although most days it leaves me tired, spaced out and emotionless. Crazy right?
Why would anyone want to feel like that. Well this is why.
I suffer from depression and anxiety. Let me start by saying, I don’t have suicidal thoughts and this is very hard for my to explain. My depression is simple things like relationships and friendships become so trivial, so complicated.
In my brain it doesn’t sit right, something seems different. I notice little differences that ‘normal’ people wouldn’t notice.
That comment you didn’t tag me in, but you tagged other people? I saw that, why didn’t you tag me? What’s up with me?
You read that message, I saw you did, but you didn’t reply.. why didn’t you reply? Have I done something to upset you?
You didn’t say I love you on the phone.. do you not love me anymore? Do you love someone else instead?
They just made a comment about me. Was it a joke? Was I supposed to laugh? Or do they mean it? Are they being nice? Are they talking about me? Do they talk about me? I bet they don’t like me really.
I say sorry all the time. I feel like I annoy everyone.
And for all those questions I will spend hours trying to answer. Let it all build up in my mind, until it sends me to tears…… it’s mental that isn’t it!!! That I see things that way.
It’s not only mental changes, but physical changes. I don’t eat a lot, mainly rubbish, because I need it now and I need the energy from lack of sleep. Insomnia, up all night answering questions to situations that don’t even exists. or sleep to much and waste half my day still feeling tired.
I still smile and I have every excuse for when you ask why.
But the tablets help me.
Because I know when I start to feel this way or think this way, I need help.
I know that when my behaviour starts to change, I need guidance.
And I understand that I don’t need to be ashamed. I don’t need to be understood. I just need to be accepted. Everyone is fighting a battle and sometimes you need to be kinder to realise what people are going through.
So I may just be another person who’s talking about mental health. But I want to show you that you should speak out, shouldn’t be ashamed and be proud that your strong enough to show your weaknesses.
And to my family and friends, I love you and I’m grateful, because living with this illness is hard, but trying to understand it, is even harder.
Don’t suffer in silence!”
Below are some of the comments to his post.
We asked Billy how the response has been, and how it made him feel:
“The response has been unreal, the amount of people it has reached, benefited, guided and helped open up is amazing! I feel proud for speaking out!”
Billy has now made an Instagram page, @RuOkUK, which aims to listen to more stories just like his.
Published on October 7, 2020 at 12:59 pm